There Is Nothin’ Like a Dame

Lyrics By Oscar Hammerstein II  Music By Richard Rodgers

Eager to make it to Bali Ha’i, where they hope to find shrunken heads, ivory bracelets and female companionship, Luther Billis and the Seabees celebrate the power of women.

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"There Is Nothin’ Like a Dame" Lyrics

Sailor:
We got sunlight on the sand,
We got moonlight on the sea—

Seabee:
We got mangoes and bananas
You can pick right off a tree—

Sailor:
We got volleyball and ping-pong
And a lot of dandy games—
What ain’t we got?

All:
We ain’t got dames!

Marine:
We get packages from home,

Sailor:
We get movies, we get shows—

Stewpot:
We get speeches from our skipper—

Soldier:
And advice from Tokyo Rose—

Seabee:
We get letters doused wit’ poifume—

Sailor:
We get dizzy from the smell—

Billis:
What don’t we get?

All:
You know damn well!

Billis:
We have nothin’ to put on a clean white suit for.
What we need is what there ain’t no substitute for.

All:
There is nothin’ like a dame—
Nothin’ in the world!
There is nothin’ you can name
That is anythin’ like a dame.

Marine:
We feel restless, we feel blue,

Seabee:
We feel lonely, and in brief,
We feel every kind of feelin’—

Professor:
But the feelin’ of relief.

Sailor:
We feel hungry as the wolf felt
When he met Red Riding Hood—

All:
What don’t we feel?

Stewpot:
We don’t feel good!

Billis:
Lots of things in life are beautiful, but, brother,
There is one particular thing that is nothin’ whatsoever in any way, shape, or form like any other.

All:
There is nothin’ like a dame—
Nothin’ in the world!
There is nothin’ you can name
That is anythin’ like a dame.

Nothin’ else is built the same!
Nothin’ in the world—

A Tenor:
Has a soft and wavy frame
Like the silhouette of a dame.

A Bass:
There is absolutely nothin’ like the frame of a dame!

Marine:
So suppose a dame ain’t bright

Sailor:
Or completely free from flaws—
Or as faithful as a bird dog—

Seabee:
Or as kind as Santa Claus—

Soldier:
It’s a waste of time to worry
Over things that they have not—

Sailor:
Be thankful for—

All:
The things they got!

There is nothin’ like a dame­–
Nothin’ in the world!
There is nothin’ you can name
That is anythin’ like a dame.

There are no books like a dame
And nothin’ looks like a dame.
There are no drinks like a dame
And nothin’ thinks like a dame.
Nothin’ acts like a dame
Or attracts like a dame.

There ain’t a thing that’s wrong with any man here
That can’t be cured by puttin’ him near
A girly, womanly, female, feminine dame!